The team responsible for the amazing discovery of the missing Beagle 2 Mars probe have been commissioned to act for a collective in a much more challenging search.
Aberystwyth University have won much praise in their diligent and time consuming detection work for finally solving the location of the ill fated brain child of the sadly missed Professor Colin Pillinger.
The collective, which is composed of many unfortunate victims of Pissemoff Homes PLC have formed a group whose sole aim is to see if they can locate the missing morality of Pissemoff Homes PLC. It was last seen in about 1975 and the current staff cannot remember whether they had ever seen it. A retired board member for Pissemoff said that he recalled seeing it on one of their ultra low quality kitchen worktops next to his Capri keys and can only think it must have fallen into the huge gap where the wall normally meets the cupboards. He couldn't recall which house this was even, as it was indistinguishable from all the same crap they built since.
So the spark of realisation occurred to one poor victim, Melvyn Carter, that this was precisely the challenge that faced the University searchers on Mars, looking for a small insignificant object in a sea of unending dull and featureless landscape. Mr Carter had this 'eureka' moment whilst listening to the radio in his car. He was just adding net curtains to his car as he was spending more and more time in it owing to the forty odd members of the snagging team camped out in his house twenty four hours a day, when the story of the Beagle 2's discovery was expounded.
"We're very excited by this search", said Mr Carter, "to think that there is finally a real possibility that we can locate this small part of Pissemoff's humanity is a fantastic thought!"
"everyone in our collective of unhappy buyers contributed five pence to fund this and we raised the four million pounds required virtually overnight!", he exclaimed excitedly.
A spokesperson for Pissemoff was not as upbeat about the prospect and said that it was pretty unlikely that they would locate the morality but they might find the care, sympathy, empathy, pride, happiness, loyalty, courtesy, honesty and other parts that would render Pissemoff almost as lifeless and unprofitable as Mars.
Disclaimer: This story is satire - this means it is for
entertainment only and is not true. Mr Anthrop accepts no responsibility
for the accuracy or otherwise of this information - it is all untrue.
If you are a house developer reading this, well done!
